Squeaks' Space

A bit of Independence...

2011-07-05T11:16:00.000-05:00

Yesterday was emotional for me. I kept thinking about the idea of independence and what it means to be free. It's a glorious, miraculous, beautiful, scary thing to be free. But I am not. Not truly. Not anymore.

Some of my fondest memories are of driving home from college for long weekends and holidays. That six-hour road trip meant hours of quiet reflection peppered with my favorite music and stops along I-35. A girl and her car. Nothing better.

Even now, after 14 years of marriage, my hubby wubs knows I need the freedom to hop in the car, go to a bookstore, a friend's house, a coffee bar, or even - up until recently - out of town.

The 30-minute trek to work every day is not easy. I am acutely aware of each mile that separates me from safety. With Meniere's Disease, driving can be scary. Attacks sometimes come suddenly. A once-clear road appears blurry and the traffic melds into a kaleidoscopic crayon soup on blacktop.

Thank God, my attacks have come in "convenient" locations: work, home, a friend's house, in public but surrounded by friends. I haven't experienced an attack while driving. Yet.

That "yet" shackles me to fear, keeps me from true freedom. No key exists to release me.

A couple of weeks ago my mom was experiencing stomach pain - bad enough she had my dad take her to the ER. She's a tough, strong woman, so I knew the pain was excruciating. Doctors ran tests and found tumors on her ovaries. They loaded her with hydrocodone, sent her home, and scheduled her for a hysterctomy. Like most of the women in my family, she is allergic to hydrocodone. After dry-heaving for several hours (and exacerbating the pain), mom had dad take her back to the ER. The hospital admitted her and rehydrated her, then took her into surgery. When the docs opened her, they found cancer on her ovaries. Two of the tumors had burst spraying cancer into her abdomen. After tests, the oncologist said it is stage three ovarian cancer.

She sees her doctor today for the four-week post-surgery check-up. Tomorrow she gets her portacath. Monday she starts chemo.

I want to be there. Would give anything to be there. But I can't go. It's a 4 1/2 hour drive and one I can't make alone.

Independence: America = 1; Me = 0.

Meniere's Monday - A bit of blah

2011-06-20T14:19:00.000-05:00

Today is definitely not a good ear day for me. Buzzing, fullness, pressure, eyes burning, headache, distortion, and...wait for it...dizziness. Woo-hoo.

Yeah - it feels like this...

I am praying that all of these symptoms are a result of being gone for the weekend (in a higher altitude) and not a precursor to an attack. I don't have time for an attack. Nor the patience.

So this is it. Short. Simple. Not sweet.

Until tomorrow...

The Thursday Three - A culinary treat

2011-06-16T13:55:00.000-05:00

This has been a strange week. If I were Bill or Ted in an excellent adventure, I might even say that, "Strange things are afoot at the Circle K." Is it sad that I enjoyed that movie? I digress...

The dark clouds brewing in the Tulsa sky cast a pallor of portent on the day. Since I am traveling to Arkansas with my bestie tomorrow to visit my parental units, I am praying for clear skies. Even though we need the rain. I simply want it to wait until I'm done driving. Just sayin'.

I have learned crazy things this week by listening, watching, reading, and praying. Sometimes by osmosis. But only when I'm in an alternate universe where things like that are the norm. Heh.

This week, some interesting culinary tidbits for you. My hubby-wubs was a chef at one point in his career, and I have learned a lot from him about cooking. Not that I do much. I'm a simple gal. A Pop-Tart and a glass of milk and I am good to go. But he uses every pot and pan in the house. Cooking is a production. So I watch. Mostly.

I read this week that beetles taste like apples - I'm not sure if they are more like a Granny Smith or a Red Delicious. I prefer a nice Gala.

This? Or...

This??

Also, wasps - stinger and all - taste like pine nuts. I'm thinking I could save money on my pesto recipe since I have a wasp metropolis in my backyard. Might have a bit of a bite to it, though. Sorry. Had to do it.

Will Augment Special Pesto (W.A.S.P.)

Finally, worms offer the essence of fried bacon. Mmm... Scrambled eggs and worms. Gulp. These are the only kind of worms I'm willing to consider...

I offered to make a nice beetle, wasp, worm salad last night but hubby-wubs declined. What's that about?

Next time you are running low on grub, head out to the garden and rustle up some critters. Then let me know if you liked it.

Space - The New "Writing" Frontier

2011-06-14T10:05:00.000-05:00

I read a great blog post today on The Writerly Life called Finding Your Writer's Space. Check it out. Go on...

Blair's post made me think about several things:

The space I devote to writing
The time I devote to writing
The distractions that keep me from writing

I visited a new church this past Sunday (shhhh...don't tell Alex!) and the pastor discussed 1 Corinthians 7:25-39. Something Paul said really hit home...and has been haunting me ever since Pastor Mark said it out loud: "I want you to do whatever will help you serve the Lord best, with as few distractions as possible." 1 Corinthians 7:35 NLT

As few distractions as possible? Did Paul have any idea what it would be like to live in a world of cell phones, TV, the Internet, blogging, Facebook, 60-hour work weeks, traffic, etc... Everything is a distraction to me these days. My laundry. Dishes in the sink. A new book. An old friend. Squeaks.

After the sermon, I was in a daze. Have been since then. What are my distractions? Are they keeping me from serving the Lord to the best of my ability? Try answering those for yourself. Not easy.

Most of you know I have been working on a Young Adult novel. The tides have changed and now I have to write it. God is urging me to share my main character's story. So writing her story is a way for me to serve. But that means I actually have to sit down. Write. Not fuss. Not dilly dally.

My writing space at home is a combination home office and library. It is not ideal. PLUS, I have another furry distraction.

Wish I could be that happy about MY belly...

But I'm done making excuses. It's time to write. I'm not going to think about the mess in the closet or the pile of laundry. Those things can wait.

If I had magic lamp with a genie, this would be the best writing space on the planet - It's Laurie Halse Anderson's Writing Cottage. Me = jealous.

So...ask yourself:
What are my distractions?
What is my ideal writing space?
What am I going to do to eliminate the distractions and write?

Meniere's Monday - A bit of history

2011-06-13T11:21:00.001-05:00

It's Monday. Yes - the dreaded beginning of the work week. No fear, gang. We can get through this.

Since I have chosen to use Monday as the day to update my Meniere's condition, I thought this might be a good time to let you know a bit about the hard-to-explain, difficult-to-diagnose, ridiculous-to-treat, all-consuming, unpredicatable disease named after a French doctor, Prosper Meniere. In the late 1800s he concluded that vertigo stems from issues in the inner ear. Essentially, the inner ear produces excessive amounts of fluid, causing a host of annoying symptoms. Since Dr. Meniere's initial discovery, doctors, scientists, researchers, and pharmaceutical companies have tried - without success - to treat this disease.

One of the biggest issues with treating Meniere's is that it affects each individual differently. Some people experience mild symptoms while others suffer daily and have to relinquish anything resembling a normal lifestyle - including driving. Imagine a dizzy person on the road... Not pretty.

What are the symptoms, you ask? (I'm assuming, of course, that you asked...)
1. Dizziness: This happens if I stand too quickly, turn my head in a certain way, see flashing lights or flickers, get too hot, am in a crowded space, ride as a passenger, fly in an airplane (as opposed to using my own wings), am in high altitudes, exercise vigorously, have a cold, or sit/stand too high.
2. Ringing in the ears: Mine is intermittent and ranges from a high-pitched squeal to a guttural train sound. I get this more frequently at night or when my ears are full.
3. Hearing loss: This fluctuates and is annoying. Some days, I can hear just fine. Other days are dreadful and I can't hear a thing. Then there are the days when things are too loud. I carry ear plugs, have a hard time listening to music in the car, can't sit in noisy restaurants, and have issues with loud voices. BUT - I use the closed captioning on my TV and prefer texting to talking on the phone because I can't understand the words.
a. Distortion: This is a byproduct of the hearing loss. To me it sounds like everything comes through a busted speaker. Think Charlie Brown's teacher buzzing in your ear.

b. Autophony: Another byproduct. This one is loads of fun. It's when the sound of my own voice bothers me. OR - even better - when I can hear my heart beat or my breathing sounds extremely loud. This symptom alone has kept me from singing - something I have been doing since childhood.
4. Fullness and pressure in the ears: This is constant for me. I always feel like I need to pop my ears but can't. This, too, adds to the hearing loss. If I switch sides when sleeping, I can actually hear the fluid dripping from one ear to the other.
5. Migraines: Yep. You guessed it. Headaches are dessert. I get them. Not often. But when I do, I need to sleep.

Two years ago, an audiologist diagnosed me with severe Meniere's in BOTH ears. I am taking this thing one day at a time. My prayer is that I can share my experiences so that others with this disease know they are not alone, and those who know someone with the disease will begin to understand what it's like.

The Thursday Three

2011-06-09T22:21:00.000-05:00

So it's a little late in the day to post my Thursday Three, but I'm a working woman. And I'm doing a Beth Moore Bible study with my friend. God, friends, and work. THEN blog.

This has been a fruitful week for me on the learning front. Interesting things percolate and simmer in the knowledge-sphere, enticing me, tantalizing me, zombifying me. My friend Flea did something very evil. "Really evil. Like so evil, that you would say it was E-VEEL, like it's the FRU-ETS of the DEV-EEL. E-VEEL." She told me to Stumble. It's bad enough that I have Meniere's Disease and stumble involuntarily, but NOW she expects me to Stumble voluntarily.

Consider this a warning. Creating a StumpleUpon account will evaporate hours in your day like an afternoon sprinkler on a Tulsa summer lawn. I arm myself with a mantra: "Six Stumbles. That's it." Two hours later, the mantra cackles at my lack of willpower.

In honor of the Thursday Three, here are three things I learned this week while stumbling:

1. While sitting in my inglenook, praying for petrichor, I listened to the susurrous purr of Squeaks and the ceiling fan. Squeaks is my talisman. Some would say I am just an ailurophile - a crazy one at that - but I know she has brought me luck.

Like my purty words? Visit this site to learn the "100 Most Beautiful Words in the English Language".

2. I stumbled onto another fantastic site. Especially for bibliophiles. It's called GoodReads. Visit it soon. One of my favorite features is the ability to search for author quotes. I stumbled upon a page of C.S. Lewis quotes.

Here's the quote: "I believe in Christianity as I believe that the sun has risen: not only because I see it, but because by it I see everything else." Think about that. Let it sink in. Now breathe.

3. I love popcorn. It's a weakness. Microwave popcorn = BAD. Popcorn on the stove in my grandma's Magnalite pan with REAL butter, sea salt, and lots of napkins = GOOD. Dang. Now I want some. Where was I? Oh yes. Popcorn. Interesting fact: Pilgrims ate popcorn at the first Thanksgiving dinner.

Hmm... Perhaps...

Forget the turkey! Let's have some popcorn.

Mmmm. Popcorn. And Stumbling.

Of Thievery and Memes

2011-06-07T15:02:00.000-05:00

I stole this meme from my good friend Flea. She, of course, stole it from someone else who I am sure stole it, too.

We are all just a bunch of thieves - the crazy Band of Bloggers. Steal away. You know you wanna!

With this Meme I will ask you 5 question which could be book related or not so we can get to know each other better! The only rule is you can't use the same answer twice!

1. What new book coming out soon do you plan to buy?
2. What upcoming book are you dying to read?
3. What series is a must read for you?
4. What new author have you found so far in 2011?
5. What little known author are you a fan of?

My answers (via Squeaks, of course!):

1 and 2. I have a slight problem. Books for me are like potato chips for most people. I can't buy just one.

For SURE I want Steven James' The Queen (pre-sale right now). It's the 4th book in the Patrick Bowers series and I am hooked. I am always anxiously awaiting Lee Child's newest Jack Reacher book, The Affair (also on pre-order). Finally, I will be running to buy Flesh and Bones, the newest Temperance Brennan book in the Kathy Reichs series. Patience isn't my best virtue either, so pray I make it until August and September...

3. Yikes. Seriously!? Jonathan Kellerman's Alex Delaware series, see all three in #1 and 2, John Sandford's Lucas Davenport series, that snarky P.I. Isabel Spellman of Lisa Lutz's Spellman series, and I really enjoy Harlan Coben's Myron Bolitar series.

4. I have discovered some phenomenal writers in 2011. I loved Nancy Rue's The Reluctant Prophet and can't wait to read the next book in the series. I had the opportunity to meet her and learn from her at the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writer's Conference. She is an amazing person and fantastic writer. My good friend Flea also introduced me to some Christian writers: Dee Henderson, Kristen Heitzmann, and Liz Curtis Higgs.

5. Little known author? Hmm...Gabriela Mistral. She was a Chilean poet. Diane Wakoski. Phenomenal poet. I also love Chitra Divakaruni. She entices you with her words. Her novels AND poems are excellent.

Your turn. Steal from me. Put it on your blog or just share the questions with friends. You never know what you will learn.

Meniere's Monday

2011-06-06T11:48:00.000-05:00

It's Monday and that means it's time for an update on the Meniere's Disease.

Last week proved to be a "good" week. I use the word "good" loosely as my barometer of good has changed since getting the "Severe Meniere's Disease in BOTH Ears" diagnosis two years ago. Good for me means pressure in the ears, issues with hearing - either I can't hear or things are too loud, and no dizzy spells.

I woke up last Thursday with my right ear completely closed. I tapped the side of my face and couldn't even feel my finger. It was an odd sensation. Not quite numbness. A little like being swollen. Friday - after sleeping all night on my left side - the fluid switched to my left ear. Hey - I'm all about balance. No double standards for these ears.

I have a new tool in my Meniere's-fighting arsenal.

Definitely NOT high fashion but VERY useful in fighting nausea!

I feel a bit like Wonder Woman when I wear them. Only not as cool. Or awesome. But the Sea Bands work. They are cheap, come in a variety of colors (even fun ones for kids), and aid in the suppression of nausea. Initially, I assume they were intended for travelers. Now, however, pregnant women wear them to prevent morning sickness, and cancer patients use them for all the dreadful nausea associated with chemo. Crazy, huh?

They are simple to use, come with a nifty carrying case, and are washable. I highly recommend these for anyone experiencing nausea from any affliction. Now...if I could just find some cool gold cuffs to stop the dizziness (and bullets...mwahahaha), then I could be the Meniere's Maven. Yes. I like the sound of that.

You inventors out there get crackin'.

Until we meet again. Or I write again. Whichever comes first.

Pretend Post, the third

2011-06-04T13:57:00.000-05:00

Here's my post. It's all pretty like.

Squeaks on my pillow

Meniere's is not my friend

2010-03-29T23:43:00.004-05:00

I haven't posted in a long time. Mainly I have been wallowing in self pity. Try it sometime. It won't get you anywhere, but, hey, everyone needs to wallow. I actually like that word. Wallow. It sounds like something birds say when they are congregating in a park. Wallowallowallowallow. C'mon. You know you want to say it.

Anyhoo...Meniere's disease is changing my life. Not because I am allowing it to. It just is. It's unavoidable. In the past 30 years, scientists have not advanced the treatment at all. Nobody knows what causes it. Each person reacts differently. Some people have it severely or mildly. Some people experience it in one ear. Some in both. Some people stay dizzy, throw up, lose their hearing, and suffer from depression. Some experience mildly annoying symptoms. Predictions are impossible.

My doctor - the third one I consulted - told me that patients who have an attack or episode experience the same level of depression as terminal cancer patients with less than one month to live. Fabulous.

I am in a funk. Every day I discover things Meniere's is taking from me. I don't want to be this person, though, who wallows in self-pity. I don't want to let the disease change who I am. I just don't know what to do.

For now, I will wallow. With a Klondike bar and a bowl of popcorn. And Squeaks in my lap.

My friend Flea's writing contest

2009-09-18T10:17:00.003-05:00

My good friend Flea started this wonderful writing contest. She plans to continue it once a month. It started from a great idea I read here. Basically, go to your favorite thrift store, find the cheesiest, tackiest knick-knack and write its story. Write about the history of the thing or write from its perspective or write about its owner and why he/she purchased it. Use the object as a symbol in a WIP (work in progress). You are only bound by your own limitations.

The first object Flea used for her first contest was a ceramic dog statue. I decided to write something for the contest...it gave me a break from working on my novel and grad school and paying bills. Please visit her site and vote for FLEA'S story...NOT mine. Only four people have voted. The voting tab is in the top right corner of her blog. Then join in the fun next month. I plan to write a story for each object. I figure if I have twelve stories, that's better than nothing.

So visit The Good Flea, read through her wonderful posts, and vote...for HER story.

To Learn is to Live

2009-08-28T20:39:00.004-05:00

1. Making eggrolls is relatively easy. I cooked some ground chicken with a bag of cole slaw. I seasoned it with soy sauce, pepper, and garlic. I set that off to the side and then laid the eggroll wrappers on a cutting board. I loaded the wrappers with a spoonful of the chicken and cabbage mixture, and then rolled them according to the diagram on the packaging. Alan got the canola oil to about 350 to 375 then dropped in the eggrolls until they were a beautiful golden brown. Alan made an AMAZING dipping sauce with pineapple and soy sauce that pretty much rocked my socks. Life was good last night in the Jenkins household.

2. The United States produces more tobacco than it does wheat. I don't even know what to say about this other than grrrr....

Sure it's a pretty plant, but once it's dried and mixed with nasty carcinogens, it does ugly things to lungs and the atmosphere...not to mention clothing, skin, and hair. Just sayin'.

3. Each year, approximately 250,000 American husbands are physically attacked and beaten by their wives. I wonder if these attacks happen after the husband answers the question, "Does this outfit make me look fat?"

Learning a la mode

2009-08-24T21:48:00.012-05:00

Since I have spent the past couple of days in a classroom filled with graduate students and PhDs, I have encountered just a few pieces of new information. A lot of it is quite, um, boring and nothing I would reiterate in this forum. I would like for my readers to return. I will narrow down my focus to a few interesting facts.

1. I found an interesting quote today by Ernest Hemingway. He said, "Happiness in intelligent people is the rarest thing I know." It made me think of Ecclesiastes 1:18: "He who increases knowledge increases sorrow." The more we know, the harder it is to for us to be happy with the state of things... Maybe that's why there are so many ignorant people in the world; they are afraid to learn because it might make them think and thinking might make them sad.

2. I love milk. Mostly with cereal, but I also love a glass with a freshly-baked chocolate chip pecan cookie (or three...). I had no idea that if you were to pop in Mozart's Greatest Hits or even "Mmm Bop" while milking a cow, it would give more milk. It's true.

3. When I was in high school, I wore a lot of black. Ok...I still wear a lot of black. What? It's slimming. I am also short. The combination of my clothes and height landed me the nickname "Penguin". I didn't mind because I like the tux-wearing, life-mate loving creatures. I love to watch them, too. One thing I didn't know until today is that penguins can jump as high as 6 feet in the air. Who knew? (Apparently the elephant is the only animal that can't jump.)

Lessons learned

2009-08-23T00:18:00.002-05:00

Today has been a LONG day. I was up at 7:30 for an Ink Slingers meeting. After the meeting, I ran home, packed, cleaned the bedroom, picked up a prescription, and drove four hours to Denton, TX. I have to meet for three days for one of my grad school classes. I am exhausted and have to be up at the butt crack of dawn tomorrow morning (this morning) for my first class.

Here's what I learned today:

1. Comfort Inn and Comfort Suites are not the same thing, but the information operator can't differentiate. Imagine my surprise when I called the operator, she connected me to my hotel, I got directions, parked, grabbed a couple of bags, waited for ten minutes in the lobby with three screaming kids running rampant (not my kids...), handed the receptionist my rewards card, and then she handed it back to me (shaking her head) and told me I did not have a reservation. She told me I was staying at the Comfort Suites. When I asked where it was she said, "You will have to call them and ask them as I am very busy." There was nobody else behind me in line. Thirty minutes later I found my hotel. Grr...

2. Even though a hotel claims it is "non-smoking", if some of the rooms have been smoked in within the last 20 years, then they still reek. My room smells like the bottom of an ashtray. But it's non-smoking, so I guess that makes it all better.

3. Hotel rooms are either bordering on Arctic temperatures or are reminiscent of the fiery pits of Dante's Inferno. There is no in-between, Spring-like temperature. It's winter in Russia in my room right now. I prefer that to a summer in Phoenix. Just sayin'.

What I Learned

2009-08-21T20:08:00.005-05:00

Today was a roller coaster for me...

1. I learned that loving people is hard. Sometimes you have to step back and look at things from the outside because being on the inside puts you too close to things. Take a picture, for instance, if you hold it right next to your face, the picture has no dimension, all the lines are blurred together in a soup of randomness that has no meaning. As you start to pull the picture away from your face, lines start to form, creating distinct images that allow you to see the whole picture. Relationships need this "hold the picture away from your face" period sometimes...just to help you see your image in it more clearly.

2. I was reading about the human body and some of the strange things about saliva and our bones. I probably read for over an hour, digesting total randomness, and I walked away with something completely fascinating and purely useless: The human tongue is as unique as a fingerprint in identifying a person. Seriously? Are police stations going to start tongue-printing people, too, on the off chance someone leaves a tongue imprint at the crime scene? Perhaps the criminal decided to lick a stamp or an envelope on his way out the door. Yes, that makes sense. Oh, by the way, (this one's a freebie) a stamp has 1 1/2 calories. Just in case you like to watch your waistline, that tidbit of info might come in handy.

3. My friend Flea and I went to lunch today at one of my favorite bakeries in the whole world. I know what you are thinking. We feasted on appetizers of donuts, moved on to a lunch of cream puffs and turnovers, and had a dessert of cupcakes. Nope. This bakery serves sandwiches. And their sandwiches ROCK! If you are ever in the Tulsa area, head on over to Merritt's Bakery. Go on. I double dog dare you. We had an amazing sandwich with roast beef, provolone cheese, and horseradish. All of this yuminess was on homemade focaccia bread. Flea and her hubby have an amazing garden and she was talking about planting some horseradish, only the stuff grows like a weed and likes to take over, so it needs to sit in time out all by itself. While eating the sandwich, my sinuses opened up like the heavens and I didn't cough for the next two hours. Oddly enough, I discovered that horseradish has been known to help with bronchitis, coughing, and sinus infections. Go figure. I didn't need the Tussionex after all.

Three things I learned today...

2009-08-20T15:48:00.004-05:00

1. Excessive amounts of coughing leads to losing one's voice and sounding like a seductive femme fatale from a noir flick.

2. If one doesn't set the brakes on a pup (a mobile storage unit) that is full of product, then the pup will roll in the parking lot and hit a parked car. Yes, this happened today. Thank goodness we are not liable for the damage to the vehicle. Thank goodness nobody was in the vehicle.

3. In my lifetime, I will shed over 40 pounds of skin. Seriously...that's just gross. Why can't I shed it all now and then I would be at my goal weight? Just sayin'. That might be a big mess, though.

Being sick

2009-08-20T11:21:00.003-05:00

Yes, I know...I haven't been here in a couple of weeks. I bet you are thinking that it's because I haven't learned anything. Well, you are only partially right. I learned a few things in the past couple of weeks. The problem is that I have been sick. Really sick. I woke up last Tuesday and felt like a school bus had run over me. Ok...maybe one of those smaller buses, but a bus nonetheless. Off to the doctor I went in my groggy state and waited three minutes (yes, THREE) in the "room" with other sick people until the nurse called me to the back. I think the color of my face (or lack thereof) and the charcoal briquets under my eyes made the receptionist feel sorry for me. The nurse ushered me to the scale. Ugh. I hate scales. Especially when I am sick. But hey, I lost two more pounds. Go me.

Then I sat in the next "room" where the nurse checked my temperature and blood pressure (both good) and then asked me about my "condition". I actually saw her write "school bus ran over her" on my chart. I couldn't imagine what that might look like to the doctor but I didn't say a word. Quite honestly it was hard for me to talk. She left, so I kicked back on the examination table, thinking the doctor would be at least ten minutes, and the second my head hit the pillow, he knocked on the door. He listened to my chest, checked my ears and nose, then told me I needed an x-ray. Ugh.

I walked to the radiation room and had to remove my bra and maneuver my body into contortionist shapes for the photos. Not my best hair day, either.

I napped for about ten minutes then the doctor told me I had bronchitis/borderline pneumonia.

"If you had waited one more day, young lady, you would have been in the hospital."

All I heard was "young lady"...I'm not that young. He wrote me a book of prescriptions, getting carpal tunnel in the process I am sure, and told me to take off the rest of the week. No problem. Work shmork. I needed a bed.

I got my prescriptions filled, went home, ate some soup, took my meds, and slept for about six days. I watched a lot of Food Network, too.

I came back to work this week and have been crawling through the days, inching my way to 5:00 one minute at a time. I still feel pretty lousy but not like I have been hit by a bus...more like a lawnmower at this point.

I vow to begin my "Things I Learned" again today. Unless I actually do get hit by a bus...

Three things I learned...

2009-08-07T22:32:00.003-05:00

1. A theater teacher I knew was murdered by one of his students. Details surrounding the murder are still unclear since some claim they had an inappropriate relationship and others say the boy just wanted to steal from him. Either way, it is tragic and I can't believe it happened.

2. The phrase "thank-you-ma'am" means a bump or a depression in the road. All these times I have been calling women potholes and thought I was being polite. Yikes.

3. Elephants cry and laugh. I had no idea. Honestly. Where have I been?

Reading and other hazards of boredom

2009-08-07T16:00:00.008-05:00

I am a reader. Bookstores are for me what places like Home Depot and Lowe's are for the Dabber. I walk through the doors, the cool air kisses my face and fills my nose with the freshness of paper and ink. New books, old books...I love them all. And I buy them. Lots and lots of them. I am studying to be a librarian and have a veritable library in my house, so I rarely go to a library. Sad, I know.

If someone I trust recommends a book, I buy it. I might not read it right away (hence my "own it, haven't read it" line), but I will file it somewhere on a shelf to read it at some point. I tend to read several books at a time, too. I have books stashed in various rooms in the house, and depending on my mood or location, I will read the book that happens to be convenient. Right now I am reading four books. Yes, four.

I am reading John Sandford's "Mortal Prey". I LOVE Sandford's novels. They get me in the mood to work on my novel and the story is always wonderful.

I am also reading C.S. Lewis' "Out of the Silent Planet." Several of my friends recommended this one for me. I don't usually like fantasies or even science fiction, but so far I love this one. Perhaps it is because of Lewis' gift with words.

Another book I started a friend loaned to me and it is called, "Some Wildflower in My Heart" by Jamie Langston Turner. I love it. I tend to enjoy 1st person narratives with quirky characters. So far, this one is a winner.

I just started "Seeing Voices" by Oliver Sacks. It is a book about the language of the deaf. The first few pages had me mesmerized...but then I left the room and picked up "Mortal Prey". If only I could finish something...

Three things I learned today

2009-08-06T20:26:00.008-05:00

1. Flea and I were playing the adjective/noun/verb game and one of her phrases included velvet and cut together. I mentioned something about cutting velvet and she informed me that velvet is torn not cut. Unless the velvet is plaid or has a stripe, then it needs to be cut but a lot of material is wasted that way. Since I am not much of a seamstress...ok, I can barely sew on a button...this was new and interesting to me.

2. A Kraken is mythological water creature, or sea monster. I have not seen Clash of the Titans in a long time...but I had to include this photo of a Lego Kraken a father and son team put together. It is, well, it's just total greatness.

Click on the photo to see the Squid blog where this was originally posted. The blog is no longer active...

3. A dobro is a resonator guitar invented by John Dopyera and his brother. They took the "Do" from them last name and fused it to the "bro" in "brothers". Apparently the word also means "good" in Slovakian, so their catch-phrase became, "Dobro means good in any language." Gibson now owns the Dobro name. The guitairs are pieces of art. Here take a look:

You can read a lot more about it on Wikipedia. Fascinating instrument.

Blogging and whatnot

2009-08-06T20:07:00.002-05:00

I met my good friend Flea (who has an amazing blog you should check out here) for dinner at a Chinese food buffet. Neither one of us cares for buffets as a general rule of cleanliness and freshness; however, this place was good. They even had crab legs and peel and eat shrimp. Yumminess. I ate too much...which is pretty much the rule for buffet eating. After dinner and conversation, we worked on a fun little adjective/noun/verb game that is sheer goodness for writers and nerds [think Mad Libs but BETTER...ok, better for major nerds like me]. The "game" produces phrases like this:

smug hero crisp
impulsive touch avenge

Once we concoct these random phrases, we determine ways to make them work in our writing. For instance, I could incorporate the first phrase this way: The smug hero crisped his chances of receiving a medal.

The second phrase might work like this: The impulsive touch avenges the patient thought.

I could have hours of fun with this. The Dabber [nickname for my hubby] and I "play" this in restaurants while we are waiting for our food and have resorted to writing on napkins. Dabber figured since I like to write it might behoove me to purchase a purse-size spiral. I did. I won't lie, it was a good purchase.

I have decided to try something new with my blog. I have had this blog for a while now and haven't done much with it (as you can see). Writing is important to me, so blogging will be a good way for me to write about anything. And everything. I just need to purge my words. One thing I am going to do is include a daily posting of the three things I learned that day. I might include other things as well (weekly things), but the blog will be a work in progress. The only thing I can promise is that my blog will be a real and honest representation of my life.

Stick along for the ride. You just might learn something. I know I will.

Saturdays

2008-09-13T22:02:00.002-05:00

I love weekends. Especially days when I get to do whatever I want. I woke up early this morning--unusual for me on a Saturday--and talked to my parents for over an hour. Then we met the fam at Jake's for a little late breakfast. I attempted a cup of coffee and it made my hiatal hernia talk to me. It sure tasted good, though.

Mel, the Dab and I ventured to Main Street and visited a couple of gift shops. Husbands are great for carrying purchases, by the way. Dab didn't grumble once since they had nifty cooking gadgets and samples of dips and chutney. He got overly excited with a CIA (that's Culinary Institute of America) omelet pan and a carving knife. I gave him the "look" and whispered "October 6" and he remembered his birthday.

Melissa got bored with our interminable perusal of the foodstuffs, so she ventured to the candle shop. After we dipped into the savings to pay for the dip mixes, pickles, etc., we joined Mel in scent overload central. I love candles--don't get me wrong--but sometimes they can overwhelm the senses. After Mel dipped into her savings to pay for decadent knick-knacks, she bounded off with Shawn and Jim (and the dogs) to look at houses. That's when it happened. Alan looked across the street and saw Wonderland. A Belgian woman opened a Chocolatiere next door to our favorite steak place. We braved the walk across the street and breathed in the heavenly aroma of sweet, sinful confections. I wanted to bottle up the smell and take it across the street to the candle shop.

We picked out our favorite flavors and savored each dreamy bite. Chocolate makes me happy.

The Dab dropped me at home to "work on my writing" so he could explore the city. No interruptions, I prayed. No luck.

Phone call #1: the Dab--ten minutes. Reminders, honey-do's, etc...

Phone call #2: the sister-in-law--one hour. The weather, politics, etc...

Phone call #3: friend/ex-student--two hours. Life, school, stress, decisions, self-esteem, etc...

Hunger sets in. Breakfast and chocolate long gone, I opened the fridge (I'm from Texas--that's what we call it) and searched in vain for nourishment. Settled on a kolache. Not good for my hiatal hernia, either.

I sat down to enjoy my snack when phone call #4 hit: the Dab--dinner questions, home soon, etc...

Did I work on my writing? No. Other than this post and a reply to a political blog, I did nothing. Lame, I know. My intentions were good. I don't think people realize the amount of concentration writing requires. No interruptions means no interruptions. I'm not sure it's possible. How do prolific writers manage to find the time to crank 'em out? I would like to know their secret.

It's almost time for bed. Church in the morning and tomorrow afternoon. That will give me maybe a couple of hours of writing time. Barring no interruptions, of course.

Never forget

2008-09-11T21:43:00.002-05:00

There's a thickness of fear in the air right now. The unknown hovers and skulks like a pesky younger brother intrigued by his sister's cute friends. I inherited my worry gene from my mom. She worries about everything. I try not to focus on things out of my control but I worry about other people's ignorance--especially with the upcoming election. But let's save that for another day when I have more time and energy.

Today marks the seven year anniversary of the attacks on America. Gosh, is it OK to call it an anniversary? Perhaps memorial is a better word. I think of an anniversary as something special, something to anticipate with gladness--not something like 9/11, a blight on the landscape of our history. I hope we never forget what that day meant/still means. I hope I never take my freedom for granted and the sacrifices our brave heroes make to ensure that freedom lasts a little longer.

I worry that people have forgotten what it felt like that day, when we watched in horror as our seemingly impenetrable land suffered under the hands of crazed extremists. What worries me even more is that they are still out there and still want to destroy us. They don't want to hurt us. They want to DESTROY us.

Perhaps instead of an external destruction, they are slowly eating away at the core of humanity, yearning for internal combustion.

I hope those out there who pray will get down on their knees and bow their heads and pray for the safety of our country, our people, and the heroes who fight for us to have the freedom to pray.

Take care. Never forget.

My sister's dogs

2008-09-03T15:09:00.004-05:00

This is my sister's dog, Buddy. Hard to believe he wasn't supposed to get over 35 pounds. Buddy's favorite activity is watching the Animal Planet, preferably Meerkat Manor or one of the dog shows--Westminster or Purina. He's a hoot. I can sit on the couch and pretend like I'm crying, and Buddy will howl at the top of his lungs. I don't know if it's because he doesn't like my whining or if he wants to show his support. He's part terrier, so he has a nipping fetish. His nose is crotch high, too. Those nips hurt. Not gonna lie.

Buddy has all kinds of health problems. It's sad. He has more veterinary specialists than a hypochondriac. He sees an allergy specialist and a neurologist (for his seizures). But he's precious. He should have been in commercials.

Their other dog, Dudley is a big lummox. But he's a precious lummox. He's this 90-pound chocolate lab who sighs when you won't give him a bite of whatever it is you're eating. He loves fruit, especially bananas and oranges. He loves to stretch out on their brown bomber leather sofa, playing chameleon games. If someone tries to get on the couch with him, he pushes on their legs with his back paws.

He does this trick called "Smiling dog" where he literally comes running up to you--yes, smiling--and he runs under your legs. He keeps going back and forth, under your legs, never tiring of the amusing game. He can be dragging from a long walk but if he hears, "Smiling dog", he's running for your legs. I'm short--5'2"--and he's tall for a dog. When he plays the game with me, he has to squat down. It's hilarious.

Animals sure make life interesting, don't they?

Here's to all the pets who make our lives more meaningful!

Could he be any cuter??

2008-01-07T16:38:00.000-06:00

Booger Bears to the rescue!

My leadership style

2008-01-07T10:06:00.000-06:00

Hmm...that's pretty cool!

What Famous Leader Are You?
personality tests by similarminds.com

Disaster area

2007-12-12T08:18:00.000-06:00

"OOOOOOOOOOOO--klahoma where the ice comes sweeping down the plain. Where the frozen trees break in the breeze and the wind knocks 'em over in the lane." Sorry about shoplifting your lyrics Mr. Hammerstein, but I think these new lyrics ring true. Holy moly, Batman. Where am I? My beautiful city looks like a war zone. I heard someone say that a 100-pound tree limb with 1/2" of ice on it weighs 1000 pounds. No wonder trees line the streets like litter in a Brooklyn alley. My city is broken. How many days until we fix it?

Click here to see a couple of pictures of the disaster.

More to come...

Weekend Warrior

2007-12-03T11:21:00.000-06:00

Things I did this weekend:
1. Went to the Ink Slingers meeting (it was awesome--Travis and Mark liked my story and said that, for a girl, my dialogue is hard-boiled). Candas responded well to our feedback and I think we gave her some useful suggestions for her story.

2. Alan and I shopped at Kohl's and got some wicked good deals. Took care of Mel and Shawn and bought some Santas. One thing I noticed about Christmas time and shopping--people are impatient. Isn't the whole meaning of Christmas about Jesus and remembering his spirit? Isn't that why it's called the "spirit" of Christmas? Shouldn't we focus on being forgiving and loving? I think people misinterpreted the meaning of Christmas to mean a time of forgiving to be a time for giving.
3. We ate lunch at Panera with Mel and Jim and then went to a candle show. Ate French onion soup. Yum yum.
4. Met Heather and Travis at the movies--Enchanted for me and Heather, The Mist for Travis and Alan. Good times.
5. Dinner at Fish Daddy's. More yumminess. Travis tipped back a few. Laughed at his assload of whip cream.
6. Finished Gone, Baby, Gone. It was great. I'm starting The Poet next. Then Red Tent.
7. Watched a crapload of movies--Shrek the Third, I Now Pronounce You Chuck and Larry, Live Free or Die Hard, Next, Ocean's 13, Waitress
8. Took a 2-hour nap.
Life is good. :o)

Oprah and her favorite things

2007-11-27T22:01:00.000-06:00

What a crock! She doesn't even pay for her "favorite things". The manufacturers of the products donate all the gifts to her show. She believes that people will run to the nearest Best Buy and wait in line to buy a $3500 refrigerator simply because it's one of her favorite things. That's pretty damn arrogant, if you ask me. She gave away cleaning supplies. She doesn't even clean. She admitted it on the show. (The only reason I saw the show is because I was at my sister's house and she was watching it.)

The people in the audience were ridiculous. They were raising their hands in the air, thanking God for their fortune. Do they honestly believe God has anything to do with their matierialistic greed? How were they supposed to get all that crap home? What if they got there by bus? What if they flew to the show and couldn't fit everything in their suitcases?

Oprah (code for car manufacturer) gave away cars. People acted like she was nothing short of Mother Teresa. Funny thing is, most of the people couldn't afford to pay the tax, title, and license, so they had to give the cars back. It's like a pyramid scheme: Look at all this loot that could be yours for the low, low price of one of your kidneys, and possibly a lung. You lure them with the big prize and then make them mortgage their lives to pay for the prize.

You want to do something good Oprah? How about donating your $50,000,000 home to the widows and kids of service men and women who lost their lives to give you the ability to have a show and favorite things? How about you help the poor and homeless here rather than in other countries? How about teaching people to be practical? Do people really need a TV in their fridge and $1200 pajamas?

My favorite things: waking up next to my hubby, my cat sitting on my lap, finishing a good book, a good meal, a good song, a good cry, selfless people, a smile, writing in my journal, the smell of rain, knowledge, music, being alive.

Cat Wake Up Call

2007-11-13T16:58:00.001-06:00

Seriously--this is Gizmo. End of story.

What are you afraid of?

2007-11-01T08:41:00.000-05:00

The news media
Ignorance
Loved ones dying
Being alone
Having nothing to say/write
Losing my hearing
Never fulfilling my dreams
Going to Hell
Senseless violence
Confrontation
Evil

Them's fightin' words

2007-10-30T16:48:00.000-05:00

So Alan and I have a bet going - who can lose the most weight by January 1. Looks like he is well on his way to winning as I couldn't resist a sweetened iced coffee with cream. I think Starbucks and Target have cornered the market on smells. I'm pretty sure Target strategically emits a smell, an aroma if you will, that causes our phermones to go into spending overdrive. I go in there with a list (two items) and leave with a heaping basket. I get home and realize I forgot one of the items on my list. Gee...do I have to go back to Target? If I must.

I wonder why I get brave about diets when I'm reclined, watching Bones, and fuller than a tick. I need to make diet bets when I'm famished and have a Hideaway pizza sitting in front of me. That's motivation.

Tuesday's rock. Bones. House. Could it be any better? What is it with me and one-word shows? Then Thursday's I'm all about the two-word shows - Ugly Betty and Grey's Anatomy. Hmm...

Life or something like it

2007-09-11T15:12:00.000-05:00

I laughed today.
It's been too long.

I had forgotten how good it felt.